The Night I Nearly Died: A Story of Melodrama

This post would be super enhanced by a few photos 

However my camera is currently dismantled.

So, please feel free to use your imagination.

Anyhoo, last night I came home around 11:00 PM.

I climbed the stairs [a whopping THREE] to my little front stoop [not quite big enough to be a "porch"] with a basket full of laundry, a new bundt pan, and other odds and ends in my arms. All while talking on the cell phone ... Well, I apparently walked up the side of the stairs because I found myself on the very corner of my stoop when for some crazy reason I lost my balance. And due to the fact that I had way too much in my hands I couldn't do much except FALL! My stoop is not really close to the ground and my driveway is paved. So, I stumbled off the stoop into and crashed onto the driveway a few inches from my car. I'm sure it was a sight to behold, and there is a very good possibility that my sweet neighbors think I was stone cold drunk. I promise you ... I was not. I'm just super clumsy. Anyways, the pavement ate up my foot, knee, and elbows. And everything went flying .... So I loaded everything back up and hobbled back up the stairs straight to my bathroom. I dropped everything [including that cell phone] in the living room floor and hit the tub to wash off any dirt in my new wounds. After cleaning my scrapes and scratches, I collapsed on the side of the tub and willed away the tears [because I'm a total wimp like that]. After a considerable amount of time I remembered that I had been talking on the phone so I hobbled back into the living room, picked up the phone, and the fool on the other side of the phone was still telling some long *beep* story like nothing had happened. I sat down on the floor and laughed till I cried. The poor fool didn't even realize that I nearly died. And since he doesn't know this blog exists he'll probably never even know :)